Tuesday, February 5, 2008

I Have Returned To The World Of Blogging

Now I finally have the time to blog about/explain why I haven't really blogged lately. Well, pretty much not at all.

My boyfriend and I have a somewhat complex relationship. We started out as friends, but started dating over 3 years ago. The first year was perfect. The second really tested our relationship...we definitely went through Hell and back, many times over. From August until January of this year, it was a nightmare. We were constantly arguiung and instead of talking through our problems, we'd just yell at each other, break up and then ignore our problems. I know that isn't healthy, but it just seemed the way to go at the time. For 6 months, I have been mourning the deaths of my grandfather and pappaw (Grandfather died in August, Pappaw in November) and my mood has gone up and down. At one point, I was so depressed that it took 200% effort just to get out of bed and I wasn't in the mood to talk to or spend time with him or my friends. It was brutal. I got out of my funk, but that didn't stop the arguing. I mean, we fought on Christmas and New Year's Eve--2 of the happiest days of the year for me. We took some time away from each other and realized that if we want to make this relationship work, it has to be a JOINT effort and he can't just scoff off and ignore the problem. I've been in love with him for a long time and plan on marrying him. We plan on moving in together next summer after I graduate college and secure a teaching job. There's no way we could live together right now...and I'm not just talking about finances. So far, we're doing pretty good with talking to each other. My main problem is I hate hurting anyone I care about's feelings and I'll hold them in. I have to be honest with him and have him possibly be angry at me instead of having him blow up at me after the truth comes out. It's hard, but we can do it.

Anywhoo, I've been so busy with school. I'm hardly working and I hate to say it, I have very little motivation when it comes to school at the moment. I got way too comfortable with the break. I'm trying though because this semester really counts...I want my GPA to go up and this is my last semester before I start my mentorship. I want to be seen as a professional and mature student/teacher. I'm forcing myself. Also, I've been working out more and actually liking it. I just want to tone up.

I have time to actually post makeup looks Friday! Not working til Sunday and all of my professors at school are out for the week! I found my card for my camera and fixed the problem with the software for the camera on my laptop. They're not the best looks but hey, it's a start! If I have to go into work Friday, the pics will be posted sometime Saturday.

Have a great rest of the week and weekend! Sorry the update was so long. And if you're into good music, check out The Canvas Waiting at I'm not just plugging them because I love their music...or because I went to high school and am friends with the drummer. :)